Not My Child! Monday!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Landon most definitely did not sign to me that he was all done on the potty seat only to then poop on the floor. Nope, not my child! My well mannered child knows better than to tell me that he is all done with the potty seat and would never poop on the floor as I am getting him a new diaper. Even if he had, he most certainly would not be so proud of this feat that he had to pull my hand and walk me over to it to show me while flashing me his biggest smile saying "poopie"! Nope, not my child!

Landon did not open the fridge and pull out the barbecue sauce. Even if he had managed to get out the barbecue sauce he most certainly would never unscrew the cap and finger paint Tinkerbell with the sauce. Nope, not my child! He would never find a way to cause so much trouble in the two seconds that it takes me to go to the bathroom. I guess I was asking for it when I decided to actually shut the bathroom door behind me.

Landon would never become bored with his toys and insist on playing with my sunglasses. Even if he did decide to play with my sunglasses, he would never break yet another pair of my sunglasses. Landon would never find it funny to break my back up pair of sunglasses (he broke my main pair two weeks ago) leaving me with none. Nope, not my child!

This post would never cause a discussion on the proper spelling of poopie! We would never discuss such issues as to whether it is "poopy" or "poopie". Nope, not us! Such a disgusting topic would never be prime time discussion in this house.